i'm ready.

(written on friday, december 3rd at LAX)

yesterday was my last full day in LA and it was a great day.  i was able to have lunch with someone special, had a spa date with a dear friend and had my final “going away party” dinner with my “downtown” girls.  to top it off, i got “closure”.  i didn’t realize till after the fact that this particular closure was exactly what i needed to completely prepare myself for this new journey in life.   through a short letter and verbal expression, i was able to say my peace – something i waited almost six years to say.  i was full of anger and heartache – i finally broke down and cried my eyeballs out.  i am a fool for waiting that long, but after i said what i wanted to say, i felt a sense of relief.   i am now able to leave LA with no regrets, no more thoughts of “what if’s”.   it’s finally over..  thank you for allowing me to let you go.

a very handsome man gave me a toast last night:

“here’s to big ships,

here’s to little ships,

the ships that sail the sea,

the best ships are friendships,

so here’s to you and me!”

that might just be THE best send off i could have ever asked for.  that gave me the confidence that my friendships will be safe and sound while i’m away.  who knows how long i will be away, but now, i am finally ready and excited.  to be completely honest, i haven’t been excited about my move since i made the decision – i’ve been too scared, too sad.

i’m looking forward to the new city, new job, new friendships and most of all, i’m looking forward to my new love(s). 

my friends, salila & debi got me this tee-shirt as a gift.  i absolutely LOVE it.  i thought it would be the perfect outfit for my departure from LA (along with my i "heart" LA ring!)  salila even wrote a blog post about me - i am so honored!  i read her blog regularly.  hope you'll enjoy it, too!  omg i totally heart...

“i’m looking for love.  real love.  ridiculously, inconvenient, can’t-live-without-each-other love.” – carrie, sex & the city.